Sticks and Stones

Sticks and stones may break your bones but names will never hurt me, but the pen is mightier than the sword, and least said soonest mended.
I can’t help but feel my clichés are sending me mixed messages.

The internal lexicon you have the command if is fundamental not only on how you think, but also how you express yourself. George Orwell coined the expression “Newspeak” pitched as fictional language that was supposed to be efficient and economical by reducing the number of words people use. Instead of “Fabulous, wonderful, splendid, fun, amazing, enjoyable, etc ect,” there would just be “good” and so on and so on (If you haven’t read 1984, go read it, it’s a good book!). The sinister idea behind this was that by restricting a person’s ability to express themselves, you restrict their ability to think creatively, and discourage originality of thought.
A fellow named Whorf built on the idea of language being important when he presented the Whorfian Hypotheses, the proposal that the languages we use shape our reality. He suggested that we’re restricted and/or liberated by our command and understanding of linguistics. For example in English, we often resort to saying “It smells like [thing]” as we have very few words to describe actual smells themselves, but other languages are not so hampered, having a broad spectrum of words to describe a range of odours. Poets and writers spend hours finding appropriate metaphor and simile to capture the depth and complexity of human emotion rather than being able to resort to some very specific or appropriate words. This is a very complex theory and I could tangent into all sorts of directions so maybe I will make it the subject of another post. But ultimately, the message is, words are good, reading is sacrament, and the broader your vocabulary the more rich your world will be, not only in how you describe it, but also how you perceive it

Trying to control language to shape reality is something we see in the modern world a lot, with people trying to change, simplify or redefine words to suit their current agenda. The most glaring example I can think of is how much the meaning of “freedom” changes depending on who you are talking to and their political agenda, especially in a post 9/11 world. Change the meaning of a word and you will change the way people perceive the word and how it should be, and how it is, a slightly older example would be we now have “Police Officers” and “Firefighters” not “Policemen” and “Firemen” (not that this is a bad thing, I just think it is a great and positive example.)
A more irritating example is people telling me that “Racism = prejudice + power” or “If you believe in equality then you’re a feminist.” Firstly, racism already has a definition, and secondly if you believe in equality you’re an Egalitarian. But by pushing for the redefinition of words it’s understood that it can shape a personals internal narrative and enforce Orwell’s rigidity of thinking.

As for the “Sticks and stones” argument: Let me put it this way. I show up to work and a colleague looks at me, sneers and tells me I look like I got dressed in the dark and washed my hair with a bucket of lard. This verbal abuse continues every single day. In the real world we call this harassment and bullying in the workplace, and they’d lose their job (if the HR department was any good). But when our kids do it, we somehow believe that young minds still learning how to cope with being in the real world will somehow have the maturity to blow off sustained and persistent verbal abuse that they can’t escape from simply because we quote this tired verse at them. Sure, kids have to learn that people suck, and some will never grow out of their childish attitudes and continue to be shitty people for the rest of their lives. But they also need to learn that they can do something about it! Not just meekly accept that they’re a target for these kinds of people. And trust me, empowering your children to learn that they can stand up for themselves and ask for help and see some kind of justice being done will prevent a lot of school shootings.
Humans have a fundamental need to see the world as Just and Right (The subject of another post in the future perhaps) and by denying them that need, we invite them to make the world right though their own means, for good or for ill.