As I
continue my work, hammering out an endless stream of carefully constructed
words that when read backwards will summon an elder god that will consume the
earth for good, I find I am disrupted by ex-girlfriends of ten years trying to
get through numerous blocks and bans to send me messages about how they have
decided in the interim that I am a sociopath among other hideous accusations. I briefly consider
contacting the police regarding them (again) before sighing and continuing my inexorable
shuffle towards suicide-by-coffee and/or a psychotic break that will no doubt result death, but with an amusing interlude prior where I declare a national conspiracy
of pig-people have infiltrated the government and the only way to combat them
is to slather passers-by in apple sauce, because pigs fear it, ultimately ending
when I am gunned down by the armed response unit for attempting to coat Theresa
May in a honey glaze…
Sorry,
I get distracted easily of late. This is related (somewhat) I promise, let’s
start again…
In
my journeys through the interwebs and my infrequent dalliances in the meatworld
I come across certain words that started in the vaunted halls of psychology and
have wandered into the common parlance in the same way blind homeless orphan
would wander into an active minefield filled with used syringes and raw sewage.
The results of which cause me not inconsiderable irritation, but as was
recently pointed out to me by my close family, I don’t so much have “pet peeves”
as I do “a petting zoo of peeves”. So in
order to bring some sanity to the world I’ll outline to you now some of the
words I noticed, how they are used, and how they SHOULD be used.
And
as a side note: If you think it’s funny to go ahead and deliberately use these
word incorrectly in front of me following reading this, I will share my own
humour with you, and we can both share a jolly good laugh down at the
proctology ward as you have the Collins English Dictionary removed from your
colon.
Triggered:
Common
usage: #triggered. A person expressing that something gave them a (usually
negative) emotional response, “Oh I get triggered by bees! They totally send me
into a panic!” Or occasionally used to mitigate a childish temper tantrum
thrown by somebody old enough to know better, claiming that it’s not their
fault they attacked you, as you triggered them.
Actual
meaning: A psychological trigger is usually associated with a SERIOUS underlying
psychological problem, like Post Traumatic Stress Disorder or Schizophrenia.
For example a war veteran may have a flashback triggered by firework explosions,
or a Schizophrenic may be triggered to hallucinate thanks to a specific scent
(as the memory and scent sections of the brain are very close). The difference
is that a psychological Trigger results in almost catatonic fear, hysterical
and/or irrational survival instincts, or a bust of memory so vivid that the
victim will likely hallucinate it happening again. It is not “It made me feel
bad/cry/sad/angry” that’s just having feelings, and everyone has them and they
can often be caused by external stimuli. Somehow you will have to cavalry up
and deal with them the same as every other functional adult, and not take them
out on the world around you. The entire
world won’t change for you, so you’re just gonna have to master a skill most people
do in primary school, and recognise that your feelings shouldn’t dictate your
actions, no matter how badly you want to hurl yourself to the floor and scream
while soiling yourself because somebody said a word you don’t like.
Gaslighting:
Common
usage: “(S)he said something that contradicted me! They are gaslighting me!” Or
sentences to this effect, it’s thrown around as an ad hominem to discredit a person who has likely presented evidence against
whatever claim is being asserted. Somebody proving you wrong is not “Gaslighting”
you.
Actual
Meaning: Hailing from the Victorian era and falling back into fashion,
Gaslighting is convincing a person that the reality they are experiencing is
not real, and that they are crazy. So a person telling you that you’re hallucinating,
or that you’ve got false memory syndrome, or Stockholm syndrome or (as I recently
experienced) telling you that you’re a sociopath (even though no such diagnosis
exists outside popular culture) is gaslighting you. Somebody presenting you
with an argument, evidence, or logic to contradict you is just having an
argument. Also; if somebody is telling you that you’re crazy because you’re
acting like an over-entitled, spoiled 4yr old with the emotional control of
withdrawing coke addict and vocabulary of a Pokémon, then you aren’t being
gaslighted, you’re just crazy.
Sociopath:
Common
Usage: A person who has no real emotions.
Actual
meaning: None. No such diagnosis exists in modern psychology. The closest
diagnosis would be “Antisocial Personality Disorder” which is described by a
diagnostic list several pages long, but is typified by a lack of morality that
usually manifests in a willingness to exploit others for personal gain. Though
like all psychological conditions it can manifest to greater or lesser degrees
along with a laundry list of other symptoms, it’s almost like each person has a
unique brain or something.
Clinical
Depression:
Common
usage: I felt bad this one time, sometimes I just wanna sit around and do
nothing.
Actual
meaning: In the same way that an amputee can’t “will” their severed limb to
move, you can’t manifest the energy to experience positive emotions. You’ve got
frequent intruding thoughts of suicide, no sense of self-worth. What’s more;
because you have no reason for this beyond your broken mind, your brain find reasons to explain why you feel
this way, and interpret everything around you as a reason to explain why you’re
such a waste of human skin and deserve nothing more than a quiet, unremarkable
death.
Okay,
that’s the worst contenders out the way. Perhaps having got this out my system I
can once again focus on the damn research project I’ve spent the last year of
my life doing… though I wouldn’t put money on that.
